dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
where are my pants?
in the oven.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Randomize
