Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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