C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
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