Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
