You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
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