Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
