Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
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