i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
