No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Randomize