he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
zippers are such a cool invention
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
