coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
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