Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
