ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
She's 40ish and I couldn't wake her up with a stick of dynamite. My sheets are going to be covered in glitter lotion and smell like grape vodka and shattered dreams tomorrow.
Aren't divorce parties fun?
You and I have very different definitions of fun.
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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