you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
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