the new term for farting is butt boxing.
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
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