Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Randomize
