I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
you inspire me to be a worse person
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
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