is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
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