I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Randomize
