I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Randomize
