Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
