Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Randomize
