So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
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