Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Randomize
