Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
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