Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Randomize
