see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
