This girl is more easily done than said...
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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