i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
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