I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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