HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
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