Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
