the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Randomize
