You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Panties = found
Randomize
