Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
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