Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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