I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
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