Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Randomize
