i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
