I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
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