Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
accomplished twins. life is a go
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Randomize
