I think I won the penis lottery.
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
