It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
