Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
Dude my mom stole all your condoms
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Randomize