have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Randomize
