how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
