That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
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