Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
Randomize
