Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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