so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
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