Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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