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btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
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