i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
These People Are The Epitome of Lazy
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
Disturbing Scenes People Witnessed As Children
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode